A Little Banty King

Here, north of the 55th paralell, it's a good day to stay inside.
There's a cold snap that's running from here right across the prairies.
The furnace has hardly taken a breather in the past 12 hours.
I'm thankful there aren't chores to do outside this morning.
For several years we had chickens and sheep to care for.
Often the chickens would sit on the backs of the sheep.
I still miss the sound of a Banty rooster.
The way he announced, first thing in the morning,
that he's still king of his own little world.
Woe to anyone who challenged his call.
I can be like that little rooster some days.
Except I am never, ever voluntarily awake at sunrise.

Jack Frost's Handiwork

The windows are covered from top to bottom this morning with Jack Frost's handiwork. The beautiful patterns intrigue me. It's supposed to be cold all day and worse yet tonight. When it gets to -30 I am quite content to be inside although I do miss my walk. Anything warmer than -25 and I am out there all bundled up and walking. Being cold makes getting warm all the more gratifying.

I'm off to my AA meeting this morning. I missed last week's because of icy roads so am glad to be going today. I've learned my lesson though, that volunteering to chair for the month of December, when I live an hour from the meeting, is not a good idea. I'll stick to the months of the year without cold and ice from now on. The good news is that I am capable of picking up the phone and asking someone else if they can chair for me. Which is what I did last week. I don't need to make a big drama out of it in the meantime. Did I mention that I love my home group? And am loved in return. That's the kicker. It's sometimes much easier to love than to accept being loved in return. For me, anyway.

Yesterday afternoon dearest one was having a nap when I decided to join him. The energizer bunny was sleeping right next to his head. I crawled into bed and she adjusted and I laid there and waited for what I knew was coming next. Sure enough, she gently lowered her chin down onto my head and went to sleep. It was oddly comforting although I imagine it would have made a strange photo. Dearest one asleep, my head on his shoulder and energizer bunny's head on mine.

The Little Things

I'm in a 'grateful for the little things' mood this morning.

• the furnace is working.
• the fridge has food in it.
• the energizer bunny has a little jacket to keep her warm on our walks.
• I have a new yoga DVD to try.
• Wearing my new winter jacket makes me feel like Mary Tyler Moore.
• Dearest one is home from work. His cold/cough/flu is temporary.
• I get to go for a walk before the temperature drops to minus 30ish tonight.
• Then I get to come back into a warm house and enjoy a cup of tea.
• I love having a shower. We used to have to haul every drop of water we used ,so to now have a well and plenty of water....sometimes I still stand there and count to 10, enjoying an extra 10 seconds of water....a habit I started when those 10 seconds were a luxury. After going for a walk and doing some yoga, I'm going to indulge in an extra 10 seconds of water. Methinks they are still a luxury.
• That making a gratitude list comes easily. I used to think people who were grateful were lying through their teeth.

From East To West

It's the middle of the night and insomnia is my companion. Dearest one is having the bed and covers all to himself. I rarely have insomnia anymore and for that I am grateful. With all the hoopla from the furnace being out yesterday, I was late in taking some medication, which usually throws my sleep schedule right out the window. A little blip on the radar screen of life. Every time there's a full or nearly full moon, and the sky is clear, once during night it shines right through the bedroom window onto my face. It feels like being kissed by God.

A few days ago I didn't get outside for my walk until the sun was just about to disappear over the horizon. At one point I thought there was a car coming up behind me. As I turned to see, I realized I had mistaken headlights for the moon breaking through the clouds. It was shining brightly on the road. It felt a little surreal. For on one side of me was the clear, dusky sky and sunset. On the other was a dark sky filled with the moon and a few stars. Between the two were dark, black clouds. I kept stopping and looking from one side to the other, in awe of the view. There are times when Creation evokes a deep gratitude within me. I stood there and whispered 'thank you' over and over again.

Last month, when I found myself in a deep funk, I took stock and asked myself what was I doing when life was at its best. What works? Two things that I had let slide from my daily routine were yoga and a 20 minutes session of meditation. That period of meditation puts me squarely in the present. Being in the present scares me. Whenever I practice this period of meditation for any stretch of time, I eventually end up abandoning it, because it shakes me up at the core. On the flip side there is also a sense that it is working within me at levels my consciousness can't touch. I've heard it referred to as 'Divine Therapy.' Over the past few weeks I have slowly returned to the discipline of meditation.

Yesterday after the 20 minutes were up I felt different. When I stopped to assess the feeling I thought to myself, "oh, I'm in my body." After years of having vacated my body due to childhood sexual abuse, it feels like an incredible gift to trust my body enough to be in it. Anytime I stop living life from the neck up is cause for celebration. I'm trusting that as I continue to heal and grow, inhabiting my body will become the norm.

Yesterday, during my time of meditation, I got this sense that who I am is enough. Right now. This moment. As is. I felt myself open up and receive that who I am is enough as Truth. What other response can one have to that except 'thank you'? It's a little like seeing the sun set on one side of the road and the moon shining brightly on the other. The whole of who I am can be embraced. Thanks be to God.

Cold Feet For The Bed Hog

I'm just about typing with gloves on this morning.
Winter has truly arrived.
There must be at least 8 inches of fresh snow out there this morning.
The furnace has been out since God knows when.
Dearest one accuses me of being a blanket and bed hog - to which I plead guilty as charged. He usually spends Tuesday nights in town at oldest son's place so that
he can be at the hospital bright and early for Wednesday mornings with his students. That means one night a week I can hog all the covers and all the bed without feeling one bit bad about it in the morning.
During the night though, I was cold and thought to myself how wonderful it would be to have dearest one to snuggle up to and get warm, and then I promptly went back to sleep.

When I woke up I thought it was just a tad bit too chilly in here. When the furnace didn't respond to my attempts to turn up the heat I knew it wasn't good. I had just taken the cover off the furnace - although I have no idea what I would've done next - when dearest one came in the house and asked why was it so cold in here.

He's been sick the last few days so he cancelled his stint at the hospital today. He told himself all the whole way home that he when he got here he was drinking something hot and then crawling into bed. On top of the cold/cough/flu he has going on he has the remains of a migraine this morning, too. You can imagine his (not)glee when he came home to a furnace that needs fixing and no furnace repair people available. Which means he'll have to take it apart and fix it himself. When I plugged the ceramic heater in this morning it said the inside temperature was 40F. Yesterday it was supposed to be just about at the freezing mark this morning (which is good and warm for this time of year) and it's no where near that warm outside.

The furnace is still out. We have the gas stove going to help boost the inside temperature. Dearest one got called to the neighbours because the ambulance was stuck in her yard (long story). He isn't home yet. Methinks it will be several hours before he can crawl into bed and warm up. I may just join him. And while I normally laugh when he threatens to put his cold feet on me, and then I shriek when he does it, today I may just put up with it.
And then I'll pull all the covers to my side of the bed.

Beware Of The Dog House

In case you need a laugh here's a video to make you smile.

The Doghouse.

Linky Linky

Oh, that title is all wrong.
It makes me start rhyming nonsense in my head.
I think I've been playing too much Scramble on Facebook.
But I did want to point out that I have added new-to-me blogs and ones I've been following for a while
on my sidebar.
Check them out.

It Wasn't Always That Way

Forty eight years ago today my brother Rodney died. He was born premature and lived for 2 days. I've told his story before on these pages. I think of him every year on this day.

It wasn't always that way.

My mom was in a drunken, teary state when she told me she had no idea when he was born or when he died. She knew the month and the year but that's all. At that time he would have been 28 years old. What a long time for her to carry that alone. She didn't know where he was buried either. I had to go to my dad to find that out and then later I called the cemetery to find out his date of birth and death. And where exactly his grave was.

I promised my Mom a long time ago that I would buy a tombstone for his grave. This coming Spring I will be doing just that. I mentioned this to my mom when I saw her last month. A lone tear coursed down her cheek at the mention of his name.

The doctors told my mom the best thing she could do to cope with his death was to get pregnant. She did and then miscarried. Then she got pregnant with me. I was born at the same gestation as Rodney. We were 3 ounces different in birth weight. My mom said the nurses used to massage my chest with their thumbs to get my heart going again.

Especially because of Rodney's death I try not to take life for granted. On my birthday I thank God for another year, another breath, another step forward on the journey. Sometimes I feel guilty that I lived and he died. I know that's irrational thought but it still crops up from time to time. Other times I wonder if he would have been a protective older brother or another perpetrator.

There were many little silver numbered discs surrounding the area in the graveyard where Rodney is buried. Other little babies who only have a number to mark their life and death. Sometimes I wonder what their collective stories are and who remembers them still.

Pre Kindergarten

It's my blog anniversary today.
In blog years I'm in pre-kindergarten.
As a 4 year old there is hope for me yet.
That is good, good news.

I'd have to say that writing these posts
has been life changing.
Seriously.
That's not an exageration.
Damn. I can't figure out how to spell that word.
I feel cross eyed when I look at it.
But I do try not to live it.
Spell check has no suggestions for me, either.
Which means I've spelled it wrong by a long shot.
Exxagerate?
Exagerrate?
Good grief.
Exaggeration.
Now that looks plainly stupid.
But it's right.

Isn't that just like life sometimes?
Looks plainly stupid.
Feels plainly stupid.
Because of a warped sense of reality
and a good dose of denial
doing something a different way
looks ridiculous sometimes.
But notice I can spell
reality
and
denial.
There is hope for me yet.

Anyway, writing these posts
has been life changing
because it's freed me to look at myself.
Freed me to ask for help.
Freed me to get some help.
To grow and change in ways
I never could've predicted.
And that's a good thing.

Some of you have been with me from the beginning.
Through thick and thin.
Ha. Thicker me and thinner me.
Seriously. Thicker and thinner me means diddly squat
in the whole scope of life.
There's been some pretty sick shit on this blog at times,though.
And swear words, too.
Although I'm trying to stop using them so much.
I heard at a Round Up this past Fall that
as sober alcoholics we don't need to talk like that anymore.
Cover your ears fellow pre-kindergarteners because
I instantly had the urge to say 'fuck' over and over and over again.
Instead I pondered whether I was capable of swearing less.
I decided I wanted to try.

I think I love the word hope more than ever.
I have more of it now than I did 4 years ago.
I'm so glad hope is not a swear word.
May it continue to grow in us all.

Building A Child

"It is infinitely easier to build a child than repair an adult."
via

If you click on the above link and then choose the very short video Baseball Season: Johnny and his Dad you'll hear more of what Earnie Larsen has to say surrounding the above quote. Every video under that section is worth a listen.

I don't have much else to say except that
I was one of those 'finding 5 things wrong parent'.
I'm grateful that life's given me enough time to learn a different perspective.
I'm also grateful for the people in my life who constantly cheer me on.
We all need a bit of that.

Ten Points - Honest To God

Mary Christine over at One Sober Alcoholic gave me an honesty award. Being honest as far as I won't tell a bold faced lie comes easily to me, always has. Being honest, as in being upfront about how I feel, doesn't. Okay, now that I typed that out maybe I'm not as honest as I thought I was. (Waves hand up in air to get Mary Christine's attention and promptly confesses. Mary Christine turns Hope around in the direction of the confessional and says, 'there you go.'

There are rules.
List 10 honest things about yourself.
Pass around some linky love, seven to be honest.

1. When my kids were little I wouldn't let them pick up rocks from the road and take them home. I told them those rocks belong to the government. (Hold the laughter.)

2. If I had grandchildren I'd let them fill their pockets with rocks now and not feel bad at all. (Sorry adult kids.)

3. I am scared of spiders and mice. When my kids were little I pretended to love them and bravely let spiders crawl on my hands so that my kids wouldn't have phobias. Their hamsters could do no wrong. (except the day I thought one hamster had eaten another hamster and then I shook the cage with anger. The other hamster turned up running around the house several days later. Ever since we've referred to jumping to conclusions as 'eating a hamster'.) One day I decided I no longer had to pretend to have a love affair with either - don't think only daughter has forgiven me yet. She has no phobias about critters or bugs or such stuff. In fact, she skinned and gutted a mouse that her cat lovingly brought her and stretched the little hide, too. She then considered being a surgeon. She chose acting instead. There's some irony in there somehwere. (I do think I deserve an award for not becoming a screaming ninny when a Daddy Long Legs walked right over my hand and I took it in my stride and remarked about how wonderfully made it was even though I was a total screaming ninny inside.)

4. At heart I am a purse.aholic even though I only own one. I secretly covet those pretty purple, red and green purses that are in stores right now. The practical side of me frowns at the wanna be purse.aholic side of me.

5. When I'm in a public bathroom I cannot bring myself to use the toilet paper that someone else touched. To get around that I tear off the piece that they touched and if there's no garbage I simply let it fall to the floor. I always feel guilty about doing that but I just can't bring myself to use it. Now my kids will become screaming ninnies because I am the queen of telling them not to litter. I can just hear them telling me what If Everybody Did that?. Go check out that link. I really read them that book and often reminded them that if everyone did whatever crime it was they were doing, the world would collapse into chaos.

6. I love shovelling snow. And shit. When we worked on a dairy farm I cheerfully shovelled out the holding pen every day. This was before I sobered up. It should be noted that there were no bulls in the holding pen. Just me and the cows. (You did know a bull is not a cow, right?)

7. I like to put a puzzle together all by myself. I get ridiculously possessive of every puzzle piece as if I gave birth to all one thousand of them. At our Christmas family gathering with dearest one's family (40+ people) I sometimes avoid the puzzle table for exactly that reason. It's irrational, I know. Last year I made myself sit there and put puzzle pieces together but I really wished I had the puzzle all to myself.

8. I hate watching movies by myself. Once a year I watch the movie Braveheart. Now that only daughter lives far away I watch it by myself. When William Wallace yells out "freeedommmm" at the end of that movie I always get shivers. I pray for the courage to live with such integrity.

9. I cannot count the number of times I've sat in the car, ready to take off or even gotten part way down the driveway and then freaked out that I left my curling iron plugged in. One would've thought the world was coming to an end....Our house would then burn down. (Seriously a girl I knew in grade school set her house on fire by forgetting to unplug her curling iron. Another friend was at a United Nations meeting and left her curling iron plugged in and heard over the loudspeakers in every known language that would the person who left their curling iron plugged in please go take care of it.) So do you blame me for such irrational behaviour now? Dearest one has turned around more than once so I can double check. Every single time it's been unplugged. Sigh.

10. I love seeing elderly women with faces lined so deeply with wrinkles. I think they look beautiful. Yesterday, I looked in the mirror and saw crow's feet wrinkles bunched up around my eyes and then I frowned in the mirror to see what kind of wrinkles I'd have by doing that excessively. When I relaxed my face again and saw no permanent frown lines (a miracle I tell you) I decided that I'll take crow's feet over frown lines. However, if there was a cream that would make my wrinkles disappear I would buy stock in the company.

I suddenly have an urge to do a sixth step on nearly all these points of honesty.

I tag:

Patty
Stumbling Barefoot
bobbie
Chris
m2
UTO
wilsonian

One Step Is All It Takes

"Insight isn't change and words are not behaviour."

~ Believing in Myself

That sentence was in my daily readings yesterday. It brought me back to a time 20 years ago when a good friend came over and found me sitting in a chair surrounded by chaos. I told her I was praying for some inspiration to start cleaning. She looked at me and said, "You have to get up out of the chair and then God can inspire you." I'm sure my mouth dropped open in disbelief. That sure was a new thought to me. Many times since then I've found if I just take some kind of action, change happens. That action may be turning a heart wrenching situation over to God, it may be getting up physically and doing something, whatever it is, the action instigates change of some kind, most likely a change in my attitude.

This morning I'm headed to town where I have a few errands to run and then a therapy appointment. Dearest one and I are going out for lunch afterwards. I don't know how it is for you, but for me it's the littlest things in life that bring me the most joy. And that kind of change, the one where for today I'm not looking for life to go according to my plan in order to be happy, or for big things to happen in order to find joy, is the best change of all. Thanks be to God.

The Best Ever

Jack Frost has left a beautiful design on the windows this morning. The sun is just starting to peek over the horizon casting deep shades of pink before it. I'm grateful to be inside where it's warm.

I'm hoping to get Christmas cards finished today. I remember strings of cards up on the wall at my grandparent's house. Everyone in the community would send to one another. Sparkly and pretty, they are a good memory of Christmas for me. This year, for the first time, I'm sending out one of those form letters that let people know what the past year has held for us as a family. Those of you who read this blog know so much more about this past year, the stuff that really matters, than many who will be receiving a Christmas card from me.

I always think the year that was, has been the best ever. I love that life unfolds that way for me. The best ever might mean that it was one of incredible growth, coming only through much pain and struggle. The best might mean other things other years. Today I am grateful for the gift of life and all that encompasses its days.

Joseph and His Cohorts

I have a lovely pot of tea at the ready as I type. And yes, it's just like the picture over there. I love shopping at Ten Thousand Villages. A few Christmases ago my presents all came from there and I was pretty pleased. I have two matching cups to the teapot, too.

I've been sleeping extra long this week. I'm a thinking that writing the book took way more spoons out of me than I realized. It didn't help that during the writing I would wake up at night thinking of plot twists and turns. Just before I woke up this morning I was dreaming of being in a class with mothers and children. One little boy was telling his mom that he was scared as they went around and around and higher and higher up a mechanized stair like ride. She dismissed his fear. I spoke up and told her that he needed her to affirm his feelings so that she didn't have to deal with the fall out 20 years down the road. That his fear wasn't a reflection of her parenting. She promptly got off the ride and in the dream I imagined she was reporting me to someone for speaking so frankly to her and that I was going to be banned from the building immediately. If only someone had spoken so boldly to me way back when. I needed to hear it - although whether I would have dismissed that person, too is another story. Being right was just so darn important to me for so long. Oh, who am I kidding? Let's be honest, I still love being right but I can concede now that being right all the time is akin to not living in reality.

The energizer bunny, on the other hand, loves to go around and around and she's not scared of heights, either. I'm pretty sure she loves being right, too. And while dearest one teased me yesterday for refering to her as a person she truly is just a dog. A dog who loves it when dearest one comes home. She starts whining and howling when she hears his car come into the yard. Often she jumps up on the bay window and just about wags herself right off onto the carpet as she watches him make his way to the door. Yesterday I set up my nativity set in the bay window. She took one look at it and did what any sane dog would do. She stood there and barked and barked at Joseph and the shepherd boys as if they were intruders. I half expected to see them on the floor this morning all chewed up, but they are all still in place.

Well, the teapot is empty and I need to tackle the mess that is my desk today. With any luck we will have high speed internet by this evening and I do want the installer guy to be able to find the wall without having an avalanche of papers fall on top of him. Seriously, my desk has so much stuff piled on top of it that it's threatening to slide off onto the floor. Besides, the energizer bunny is smart enough that if she saw that happen she just might start piling things on the bay window in hopes of ousting Joseph and his cohorts. I'm sure there's a lesson in there somewhere for me.

Too Much Testosterone

I have a little snowman music box that's been sitting smack dab in the middle of the diningroom table for nearly a week already. It's been waiting for me to turn it around and around so it can dance the music out of its system. It plays "Let It Snow." And today is its lucky day. It's snowing as I type.

Youngest son bought that little snow man music box for me at Christmas time quite a few years ago. These days he'd most likely buy me one that plays music that would make me scowl at him. He does like to get under my skin in a most devious "I love you" way. The other night he and dearest one ganged up on me and had me going real good when I told them to phone oldest son to get his perspective. I still don't know how they did it because I sat there and listened to youngest son talk to his older brother and then he handed me the phone so I could plead my case. And wouldn't you know it but oldest son played right along with his sibling and father and strung me along a little further. And I believed him!! I told them I was surrounded by way too much testosterone (only daughter where are you??)for my liking and not to expect me to make them supper the next night. Such a terrible threat isn't it? As if neither of them are capable of cooking. I nearly followed through on that too, except I decided at the last minute that would be taking their good natured teasing a bit too personal. Youngest son did ask me what I put in his supper last night - like was there any poison mixed in it? I told him that he was very fortunate that I restrained myself. I am so, so gullible and they delight in teasing me every time I'm gullible enough to buy it. Which is way too often. And truth be told, I may bellyache about it, but I would miss it if they stopped.
Which is what they tell me every chance they get.
Last night I did tell dearest one though, to please put away the rifle that was resting against the couch.

Stepping Out Of Line

Monday and the first of the month.
Lord have mercy.
That combination used to trigger insanity for me.
Used to be the day when I would promise myself
that this month I would get my shit together,
would revamp my life,
would chase after perfection.
It would be the month when I got all my ducks in a row
and woe to the one that stepped out of line.
I just might shoot it.
(Kid.ding. We have guns in the house and I never so much as touch them. They make me nervous. Well, me handling a gun makes me nervous. It should make everyone around me nervous, too. Did I ever tell you about the time youngest son was fixing a rifle for someone else? He was about 12. He brought it upstairs to show me the cool lever action, reassured me he had counted 22 bullets in and 22 bullets out, and promptly shot a hole right through the wall just inches above the dishwasher. We were all standing very close. A coat zipper on the other side of the wall stopped the bullet.)

Well, that was quite the tangent.

As you can see, the ducks have no fear of having to be lined
up perfectly these days.
They know I'm not going to shoot a one of them.
I'm grateful a perfectionistic mindset is not running my life anymore.
I have no other goals for today other than
what I'd have if it were any other Monday.

I had a very full weekend.
Two AA birthday meetings - a treat for me.
When I hugged my sponsor hello yesterday,
she asked me to present her card and medallion to her.
I sat there and had quite the conversation in my head
about what I was going to say,
reminding myself that it wasn't about me,
and prayed that I could simply speak from my heart.

The funniest moment was when an elderly member said his goal was to live to be 100 and then get killed by a jealous husband. I imagine his ducks will have to be slightly misaligned for his goal to come true.

Running Late

I slept in this morning and am running late. I need to be out the door in 15 minutes. It's my sponsor's AA birthday today so I'm headed to town to celebrate with her. It's also the first day of Advent and that means I can start decorating. Ha, as if that's all Advent is about! I love Advent. The idea of hunkering down and waiting for the Light. It was during Advent a few years ago that I started getting honest with myself and God about my sexual addiction. Here's a post from back then, more for a reminder for me than anything.
Enjoy your day!

A Little Doohickey

As you can see I DID IT! 50,071 words and I am done. That little sign is the official doohickey you can upload once you paste in your words and get them verified that you really did more than type randomly for the past month. (Although at times it felt as if I was simply typing randomly.)

First I spent an hour online avoiding writing the last few thousand words.
Then I cried as I was writing the final scene.
I was mourning being done the damn thing plus the scene was heart wrenching, too.

Today has been an exceptionally good day all around.
It was birthday meeting day at AA.
I was privileged to see one of our home group get his one year cake.
We are a very small group but today we were nearly triple in size.
Every day one of us is sober feels like a miracle.
I am very thankful though, that drinking is not one of the ways I need to celebrate being done the book!

The Home Stretch

As BP is fond of teasing/encouraging me - I really am on the home stretch of the novel, first shitty draft and all. I worked hard yesterday on other stuff and as a result by the time I sat down to write last night I was weary. But I churned out over 4,000 words so that between today and tomorrow I have 2800 words left to type. I can do this. I will do this. I even know where the story is going in its remaining pages so that's a bonus.

This afternoon I'm having tea with a writer friend who is one of my biggest cheerleaders in this life. Yesterday as we were talking about the novel and I was telling her how I could just delete sections that were crap, she told me that nothing of it was wasted, that I had put in the time and discipline and that the characters, all of them who showed up, were a gift. So last night when the story took yet another detour I simply kept typing and waited to see what would happen next. Whenever I discuss the plot line and all the possible 'what ifs' with Youngest Son he tells me that I am a mean person.....mean to my characters and a little deranged to boot. Which just makes me smile. But then, you all knew I was a little deranged already didn't you?

7 Quick Takes Friday

*The title and the theme is courtesy Conversion Diary.

1.

Yesterday I was going up and down the aisles in the grocery store and was stopped by a man who wanted to know what the difference was between bleach and javex. When I told him they were the same thing, except was one a brand of bleach he replied that they sure charge a lot more for the brand.

2.

A few aisles later I was trying to figure out what kind of dog food to buy because the store was out of our regular brand. A man walked by me and said, "Just buy a bag of this and a bag of that. They'll eat it all anyway." I must have had a puzzled look on my face for him to read my mind like that. Creeped me out.

3.

I have a favourite cashier who hasn't been at her regular til for quite a while. Turns out she'd been on holiday so it was a treat to go through her til yesterday. She has a slightly cynical view of life plus a great sense of humour. She's entertaining, I'll give her that. She can't be more than 27 and has already gone through the death of her dad and her only sibling. I'd be a bit cynical, too if I was her.

4.

I like listening to country and western music on the radio. It plays as I type these posts every day. Some days I feel like I must be turning into my mother who listens to the radio (same music) more than she watches tv. Me, too. (However I am an avid fan of The Amazing Race and Saving Grace.)

5.

Only 6900 words left to write on my novel. Won't you be glad when I stop posting about it? I know I'll be glad to type the words "The End". I feel like I should celebrate somehow but haven't come up with anything yet. Ideas?

6.

We've been getting together with 3 other couples on a weekly basis for 7 years now. We orginally met to study this book and have recently reached the last few pages. Over time we've grown to share our spiritual, parenting, and marriage journeys with one another. One of the couples just went through one of their adult sons surviving a serious car accident. He still can't walk but is alive, which is a miracle. Last night was the first time they were able to make it to one of our gatherings in nearly 2 months so of course on nights like that we don't open the book at all. When we do finish the book we are going to the local indoor swimming pool and are all going to jump off the rope swing. I've never seen anyone middle aged do that so we are either going to garner a lot of applause or we'll be asked to leave for causing so much commotion. Either way, I'm looking forward to it.

7.

I continue to be hopelessly gullible. Dearest One and Youngest Son love to tease me and string me a line. I'm sure I'm a source of great amusement for them. Yesterday I walked into the public library in town and went to put my books in the return bin. A librarian I've known for close to 20 years looked at me and said, "You can't put them there." Obedient person that I am I stopped mid air and looked at her. She then continued, "We just got it cleaned out, you're making more work for us." I told her she shouldn't tease me like that because I am the most gullible person on the planet.