Living In The Tension

I came across a blog the a few days ago and in this post a sentence jumped out at me. It read:

"I have a desire to live life rather than hide from it."

The author put into words what I have been doing lately - trying to hide from life.

Yesterday at my weekly AA meeting someone talked about waging a war within ones' self and how in a war when one side waves a white flag they are surrendering to life not death.

I find myself living in the tension between those two thoughts, hiding from life and surrendering to life.

My phone went on the fritz before I could post this yesterday. In reflecting on it between then and now I realized that there has to be some level of awareness to have either of those phrases jump out at me and grab my attention. Somehow realizing that helped me see that I am not as lost as I thought I was.