Wednesday, November 09, 2005

Fully Present

I'm in the midst of trying to get ready to go to a retreat tomorrow. It's hard to explain but I'll try. I'm one of a handful of back up speakers - people who will step in if one of the main speakers gets sick or something comes up that they can't give their talk. The talk part is easy. I have always enjoyed public speaking. I get such a distasteful feeling in my mouth when people talk about ministering to other people but the only way I can say it is this....I will be part of a team whose mission is to be fully present to the 25 women who will be experiencing this retreat for the first time.

The days are long. I'm not real sure I have enough spoons to make it through the weekend. Honestly, on my own strength I don't. I'm hooped before I even begin. But I have prayed the last two years that God would give me another chance to work this particular retreat. That any suffering or sacrifice on my part I would offer up to Him. I'm not good at being other centered. This retreat is often life changing for the women who come. Jesus becomes real and personal to many of them for the first time even though they have lived in some kind of relation to the church their whole life. I have witnessed incredible healing in some of their lives. The kind that makes your spine tingle and makes you cry at the same time. I have always come away from this retreat wowed at how ready God is to work in our lives when we least expect it. Mine included.

If you would pray that I have enough spoons to see me through the weekend I would be grateful. That I would keep out of God's business and that the needs of the women there would be met would also be a prayer request of mine. Thank you. See you Monday.

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