"Beginnings are scary. endings are usually sad, but it's the middle that counts the most. Try to remember that when you find yourself at a new beginning. Just give hope a chance to float up and it will."
~ Birdie Pruitt, in Hope Floats
I've never seen this movie but when I found the above quote on a scrapbooking sticker I promptly bought it,saving it for a rainy day post. It's too cold out there to rain (-37C) but it is my mantra for today. The weekend workshop starts tonight and yes, the beginning will most likely be scary, and the ending most likely sad (plus full of relief). The middle, well, that remains to be seen. I am trusting that it will be full of hope. I eventually remember, mostly after the fact, that God sees a much bigger picture than I do. Sometimes it seems like my mantra really needs to be, "You.are.not.God. Get.over.it."
I have a post that will magically appear tomorrow morning even though I will be away from the computer. I also have the letter "P" floating around in my head for a post courtesy of Steveroni. And a lemony award from Mile 191. Which means I won't have to scratch my head for a few days next week about what to write.
Although if the truth be told, I have enough opinionated crap rolling around in my head to last me the rest of my blogging life. Finding out the world won't end if I don't say it all out loud was a surprise. It was. I was convinced that the world was as interested in my opinion as I was. I'd like to think I'm less opinionated than I used to be but that probably depends on the day. I want to be less opinionated. Less judgemental. Less know it all. God knows and is giving me plenty of opportunities to practice.
Which reminds of one summer when I worked in a stressful enviroment with women who were surrounded by invisible walls of steel. Scary. I set a boundary the second day of work which annoyed the hell out of them and prompted them to give me the silent treatment for the next 4 months. Except when I was screwing up, then they pointed it out to me, customers present or not. I had foolishly prayed on the way to work most every day that God would increase my faith. Half way through the summer I put up my hand, in a quest to get God's attention, to bargain for my prayer to be answered some other way than the reality I was facing.
One day I was in the warehouse on a coffee break when I went to the furthest corner of the room, hoping to avoid having to deal with the one who was most vicious. She came and stood very close to me while she was getting something from the shelf. I felt these waves of emotional pain rolling off her. I don't know how I felt them but I did. My heart softened and I was able to remember, for a moment, that her viciousness had nothing to do with me so I could stop taking it personally. I didn't like her any better. I still wasn't thrilled to be her coworker. But maybe we had more in common than not.