Friday, October 03, 2008

Emotionally Sober

I was awake in the middle of the night and listened to my MP3 player for a while. Before I came here I downloaded several talks from AA that one can find on the internet for free. Last night I listened to one called emotional sobriety. It was a good listen. One I'd listen to again. What he was talking about was exactly what I didn't have before I went to treatment last year. And I don't have it in its entirety either, never will, but I try and point myself in that direction daily.

Tomorrow night I get to walk two doors down and attend an AA meeting here. What I look forward to the most is knowing I will be among people who "get" who I am before I even open my mouth. It's the only place I know where the good and not so good choices I make on a daily basis are only mirrored by yours and neither of us pretend it is any other way. We have nothing to prove to one another. And instead of beating ourselves up for those choices or tooting our own horns too loudly we get to sit in the quiet solidarity of our common humanity. It doesn't get much better than that.

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