"I feel like I speak a foreign language."
That 's what I said to Dearest One tonight after running into a long ago friend earlier today. She commented to me how glad she was that I was in a specific person's life right now because that person needs God. She thinks I'm going to open my mouth and tell that person of their need. Um. No. It hadn't even crossed my mind to mention God to this person. How presumptuous of me it would be to think I know what they need.
As nice as it was to see this long ago friend I told her that if she was waiting for me to do the reconnecting I didn't have the emotional energy to reach out. That felt much better than making small talk and nodding my head in agreement about how we should get together soon.
And she most likely grates on my nerves because once upon a time I really thought that if I could just sneak the word 'Jesus' into a conversation that I was doing my part to save the world. And so I tried.
Recently someone died who I long ago thought I would 'witness to.' You know, find the right words to nudge them into the kingdom. I spoke at their funeral about the time years ago when they put love into action and how I still think about and recognize those actions as much more loving than any words I could say. At the funeral lunch I said to friends how humbling it had been to find the person I would have thought at one time I needed to witness to, witnessed to me with their life. I was into words and they were into actions.
Guess which spoke louder.
That 's what I said to Dearest One tonight after running into a long ago friend earlier today. She commented to me how glad she was that I was in a specific person's life right now because that person needs God. She thinks I'm going to open my mouth and tell that person of their need. Um. No. It hadn't even crossed my mind to mention God to this person. How presumptuous of me it would be to think I know what they need.
As nice as it was to see this long ago friend I told her that if she was waiting for me to do the reconnecting I didn't have the emotional energy to reach out. That felt much better than making small talk and nodding my head in agreement about how we should get together soon.
And she most likely grates on my nerves because once upon a time I really thought that if I could just sneak the word 'Jesus' into a conversation that I was doing my part to save the world. And so I tried.
Recently someone died who I long ago thought I would 'witness to.' You know, find the right words to nudge them into the kingdom. I spoke at their funeral about the time years ago when they put love into action and how I still think about and recognize those actions as much more loving than any words I could say. At the funeral lunch I said to friends how humbling it had been to find the person I would have thought at one time I needed to witness to, witnessed to me with their life. I was into words and they were into actions.
Guess which spoke louder.
9 comments:
Amen. Beauty.
Holy Mature Faith, Batman!
Yes...
Let your little light shine isn't that what they taught us in Sunday school.
Ha ha! What Peter said!
"I feel like I speak a foreign language." --I've never thought of it that way, but that sure enough hits the nail on the head!
About a month ago, I went to a talk about evangelisation by a Catholic speaker well-known here in the U.K. To be honest, evangelisation isn't really a big interest area of mine - I am a bit of an introvert really, so methinks that in reality I am never going to be a great evangelist, even with the best help God can give me! Anyway, I was only really at the talk because my husband wanted to go.
At the shared lunch, I sat next to some people I did not know. I could tell from their conversation that they were no strangers to such talks, but what was really interesting was that I found these people really unfriendly - in fact, they pretty much ignored me. I tried to make eye contact with them, to smile at them, but they just were not interested! It made me think.... is it not really far more important to be warm and friendly to everybody you meet than to try to evangelise everywhere you go? It is to me, anyway!
I've got a poem in one of my Bibles concerned with the truth that we do not "save" anybody. Christ does. In His own wisdom, when He deems it the right time and "through" me as He sees fit, be it with words or actions. It must be "His" witness, though, however it comes, not my good intentions mixed with my humanity....
Just got back from Pittsburgh, last week began on vacation in Pensacola with hope of celebrating our 49th anniversary there. The unexpected passing of a friend found us on the road to get to his funeral instead, not much access to a computer the last ten days or so. I visit your blog, my friend, because I like your honesty about your journey in Him....
Thank you Jim. I think of you as a spiritual father.
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