Monday, January 02, 2006

Good Hands

** Updated below

I had the beginnings of a post all nicely forming in my head and then life happens....I was going to quote from Anthony DeMello's book about love and how if a person wants to try and change the world so that it fits them, go ahead and try it but changing circumstances won't be the answer to happiness but that changing the thinking that goes on in your head will. Sigh. I spend an inordinate amount of time wishing people in my life would just cooperate with my plan. You'd think I hadn't spent any time in recovery circles by my seeming lack of progress in wanting control over everything and everyone. So much so that I ended up in confession yesterday asking for the grace to make more progress for my sake and for the sake of my relationships with those I love.

If some of you have read about Hector's daughter lately you know she got hit with a bad case of encephalitis or viral meningitis. Nasty stuff. My husband, me and our infant son came down with meningitis 17 years ago. My husband has been plagued by migraine headaches ever since, a lasting legacy of the meningitis. He takes meds for them but last week had to take it three days in a row(which is the maximum limit). I just got a call from where he works(he is an ER nurse) and he is in ER with chest pain and heart irregularities as a result of the migraine meds. I know, I know, you are asking me why I am sitting here typing instead of in the vehicle on my way there. I spoke to him and everything is under control, no sign of a heart attack but they are taking no chances and are keeping him there all day. As soon as my daughter is out of the shower I'll take my turn and then we'll hit the road. We are 90 minutes away from where he works.

We are headed out the door now. Thank you for praying. I am sure he will be okay. He is in Good Hands.

Update: I was thinking as I went to sleep last night that I probably never made the connection clear in my post yesterday between the migraine meds and the heart problems. I wonder how much of our communication is like that? We are connecting the dots in our minds and think that because we thought them the other person heard them too? The migraine medication my husband took carried risks of creating heart problems. He can't take them anymore, that's for sure. The doctor told him to take today off of work too and he is going to get a stress test done soon. The ECG showed some irregular stuff going on and only nitro spray would make the chest pain go away. With his family's history of heart problems(dad has had 3 open heart surgeries, mom has angina) they weren't taking any chances. He's tuckered right out today and yesterday is pretty much a blurr to him. He's so used to making the calls about cardiac patients, not being one himself. Thank you for your prayers. I had a very short period of time yesterday to make a decision as to whether I was going to put out a call for prayers locally on a prayer chain or put out an online request for prayer. I haven't written about my emotional reaction to all this stuff - all I can say is that we've been married almost 24 years....with all my own health stuff we've always thought I'd been gone first. The thought of my husband dying is about more than I can handle thinking about. Snuggling up to him last night was very comforting.

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