I stopped self sabotaging myself yesterday.
Recently one of my friends talked about how sobriety
gave him the power of choice back.
Yesterday I took a good look
at what direction my choices were taking me.
Where I was headed if I kept on feeding my feelings,
looking for distraction, avoiding doing the hard work.
Did I really want to return to that place?
Where self loathing and shame
were my closest companions?
No.
By the grace of God I reached for help
out of the miry clay.
Which put me squarely back in the now.
Today finds me doing the next right thing.
Where I'm grateful for the power of choice.
I wrote in my journal this morning
for the umpteenth time
"I can do this."