Originally they ask for a one year to 18 month commitment and in November it will be one year since I started seeing a therapist there. Yesterday we talked about where we both thought I was in the process.
It was a good appointment and I came away with some direction, some idea as to what is left to delve into. It's not going to be fun but I am determined to face what needs facing and do what needs doing. I survived the initial abuse. That's the most important thing. The rest is wound care. I don't mean that to sound cavalier, this healing work has been the hardest work I've done in the whole process that was jump started when I went to rehab last year.
I do, however, have a deep sense that I am okay, that I will be okay, that who I was created to be is a bigger part of my conscious living than ever before.
Thanks be to God.
4 comments:
YES! That is a perfect metaphor for this Hope. We forget that when we were "there" the first time we made it out alive. We're so much stronger than we know.
I will be praying for your work and have so enjoyed the past weeks' worth of posts. Felt like a fly on the wall.
Heading to the coast today, please pray! Wish I had time to talk! Love you!
more than a conquerer
I had a similar discussion with my counselor the other day. We talked about going from victim to survivor to.......We discuseed how sometimes you can stay stuck in the survivor role too, and in a way you keep the victim with you too, and can get stuck. She worded it differently but you get what I mean? Anyway, she explained to me that now that I am a survivor I am ready to go on to the next phase, I asked her what is that and she replied, "Being just you!" I thought that was very cool and it made me smile. Yeh, just being me.
Patty - I completely agree with what your therapist said.
My therapist never put it that way, but I'm going to take that in and use it.
You'd think that after 15 years as a "rape survivor," I'd already have figured out that I've really let that label go anyway.
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