Monday, April 08, 2013

Needing Some Lovin'

** Thank you for all the lovely comments. I just needed some reassurance in this tippy world we call our temporary home.**

Today I'm wondering what keeps you coming back to my blog.
Why do you bother?

I keep coming back to writing because it's how I process my life.
I used to journal instead. And granted, journalling was way different than what I write here but it was still a way to empty my thoughts onto a page.

Many years ago I was about to give up on blogging when I got an email from a stranger telling me how my writing had affected her journey. I leaned my head against the wall beside my desk and bawled my head off. I often forget that strangers are reading what I write. I think about the handful of people who I know read here regularly and forget that they are not the only ones.

Sometimes I see the reader numbers and wonder who are you?!
A comment would be lovely.
I will unabashedly soak them all up.
Some days are like that.

26 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hello! My name is Jenny, my blog is http://scriveneryetal.blogspot.com/

I can't remember anymore how I found your blog, but I myself suffered childhood sexual abuse, went through intense trauma therapy and experienced the close and loving presence of God, so I relate to those topics when you write about them.

While I do not have cancer, my husband and I are not able to have children, so I appreciate the raw and honest way in which you talk about your journey through pain, fear, disappointment and hope.

I very much enjoy your blog and I think you are an incredible person.

Hope said...

Hi Jenny - see - I had no idea you were reading! Thank you so much for leaving a comment. I wish we didn't have those things in common that we do.

Hope said...

And now that I've visited your blog I see you are a Richard Rohr fan, too. I gave someone a hug last night and whispered in their ear that they were my Richard Rohr buddy. Glad to have another one!

Emily J. said...

Many people are praying the journey with you.

Hope said...

Thank you Emily. I forget that even though I pray for other bloggers, too.

owen swain said...

I keep returning to read because you keep returning to write.

When you didn't write for a year I kept your rss in my feed reader so that when you did return, I'd be right here, reading.

Why do you continue to view my art? :)

Hope said...

Oh Owen you made me laugh. I have no end of admiration and curiosity when it comes to your art. Sometimes I sit and look at your art and wonder how you can translate what you see to the page. This from someone whose artistic ability is confined to drawing stick figures.

owen swain said...

Well all need luvin' huh?

julianna said...

Your blog has been an encouragement to me as I struggled with dealing with issues from childhood, recent scary health issues, and normal everyday life. You have helped me see I'm not alone and I really appreciate your honesty in sharing your stories. Thank you!

annie said...

You have a tenacity in your journey that I admire and your honesty is refreshing. But really, it is your continuing growth that keeps me coming back. And besides, now I consider you a friend and I want to know how you are doing and what's been happening with you!

Peter said...

Shout-out to the Hopester! :)

Hope said...

Thanks, Julianna! I so believe we need to know that we are not alone in the journey. That is one of the reasons I write. Surely I can't be the only one who experiences the journey like I do -I know I'm not and so I write to let others know it's okay to be human.

Hope said...

Thank you Peter. My goal is to get across to your part of the country to see you one day.

Hope said...

Thank you Annie. Yes - after years of reading one another's posts I call you friend as well. Tenacious is a lovely word. Just sucks what life throws at us in order to have it fit us.

Erin Wilson said...

because your brand of transparency is beautiful
because your writing is often stellar

because after all these years, I've come to love you, even though we've never met.

xoxo

Hope said...

Thank you my friend. One day we'll meet! I look forward to that!

Daisy said...

You make me laugh and cry. You encourage and console. You shake me up. You give me hope. You're good company on this crazy bus.

Mich

P.S. Did I mention that you make me laugh?

Seeker said...

I have read your blog - on and off - for some time, probably years rather than months. I guess I gravitate towards blogs by people who admit to having some kind of problem in their lives, as I have a few myself. I also like blogs where people talk about their faith in God, but without sounding self-righteous. I particularly dislike most blogs that proclaim themselves Catholic, even though I am one myself; they arre often the most self-righteous blogs of all.

I like the way you write a lot. I have particularly been with you in spirit during your cancer struggles, having had cancer myself (I had a hysterectomy for womb cancer in 2002).

I am interested in your A.A. experiences too, especially as my daughter has had alcohol abuse problems. I must say though that I do envy you in some ways, because of the tight support system you get through A.A. Although I don't have alcohol problems myself, I do have problems for which I could certainly appreciate having a support group and a sponsor I could ring sometimes for support would be so great! A spiritual adviser would be quite nice too, if it was somebody I could really connect with....

I haven't blogged much myself recently, but plan to get back to it. Even though I only ever had a handful of visitors to my blog, I have nevertheless always found it a great help to put down in writing what is on my mind.

Keep up the good work with your blog..... and may God bless you and keep you in good health.

Rebekah Grace said...

I keep coming back because you write what I think (and also write), but you make me feel like I'm not losing my mind. Like coming today and seeing at the top, "I feel like I'm speaking a foreign language." Yes. Me too. I need others who are walking this life out, putting words to their struggle and weaving hope through them, even if that hope is missed in a post or two (or ten). I'm tired of the culture; both the world's and Christianity and it makes me feel like a bad person, until I read something someone else wrote and I sigh and put one foot in front of another. I've been in the midst of a fierce inner battle and one that I wrote about today, then on my facebook blog page I felt belittled and devalidated as if they were saying in response, "No, that's not it." And I'm stunned at why I even give a damn anymore who reads what. But I, like you, process life by writing. Thank you for being out here in the world wide web!

Hope said...

I love being on the same bus as you, Daisy!

Hope said...

Thank you, Seeker. It's good to have you here.

Hope said...

Thanks, Rebekah Grace. I've tried hard since the cancer diagnosis to not apologize to anyone for how I feel or where I'm at. Thank you for journeying with me.

Rachel said...

I think I have been reading your blog because it seems to belong to a real person with real struggles.

beth cioffoletti said...

I come here now and then because you uncover some things that I keep under the covers and I like the way you shine the light on them. I have a number of blogs, can't seem to be able to find one voice. I am also living with metastatic breast cancer, which brings an interesting focus to things. Thank you for your honesty and for sharing it

Hope said...

Thank you Rachel. One of my motivations in the beginning of blogging was to encourage people they weren't the only one struggling with what being a human being entails.

Hope said...

It's a privilege to journey with you Beth. Thank you for stopping by and letting me know that you are reading along. I will check out your blogs.