Tuesday, November 27, 2007

A Shovelful of Character Defects

I came face to face with my not knowing when to quit character defect again today. I woke up in the night with a painful sliver infested throat (that's what it felt like) and by mid morning had a fever and headache, too. The weather has been cold and snowy so dearest one and youngest son stayed over in town last night and will again tonight.

Late in the afternoon I ventured outside to feed the animals, looked at all the snow piled up and picked up the shovel to attack it. I love shoveling snow. I haven't been able to do it for several years now because of my chronic health issues. Going to treatment this summer has changed that. Tonight I'm reminded that having a fever and headache is not the time to rejoice in being able to pick up a shovel and attack anything.

I also love shoveling out a barn. Dearest one and I spent some time working on dairy farms when only daughter was our only child. I happily shoveled shit as often as I could. We'd put only daughter in a walker on the dairy barn parlour floor and go to work milking cows and cleaning the barn.

Thank God there wasn't a dairy barn in sight today. :)


Anonymous said...

Hey, I'm a shoveller, too! Although can't say I've tried the barn thing yet but there's still time....
Hope you feel better soon. Have a nice hot cuppa tea and bundle up.

Steve F. said...

Shoveling out is a nice way of describing the 4th & 5th step, yes?

A dear friend describes it like a dirty apartment. We don't take out the trash, the pizza boxes pile up, the place stinks. Our friends would come over anyway, because they love us - but we're embarrassed to have them see the place this way. So we isolate.

We feel the same way about God. God loves us, wants to be with us, but the guilt and shame build up and we can't have God present in our mess. So we block God out, when in reality all we have to do is "take out the garbage..."

I'm one who doesn't know when to quit, either. My job is perfect proof of that...