Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Coming Home

I'm going to hunt for snow today. The only snow to be found at our place right now is north of everywhere. It will be delightful to stick my hands into the white stuff on a day where sunshine and its heat are main stage. It may be my last chance before it's all gone. Transformation doesn't happen according to schedule. With over 12 hours of daylight these days, the snow that came last month really didn't stand much chance of staying longterm.

This will be our first spring in many where we won't have lambs to welcome the season. No kittens or puppies either. Last year only daughter rescued a duck egg from abandonment and we raised it in the house until it could recognize and accept its mother, who was floating on the pond waiting for reconciliation.

On my table sits a yellow bowl that I bring out every spring....on the rim of it are the words "Spring offers hope of a new beginning." Every day, every moment offers hope of a new beginning. This season reminds me of that truth.

We are in a new beginning, dearest one and I. Perhaps it is fitting for it to be happening in a season where there's new growth daily. To help bring some sort of closure, to pay homage to our newly empty nest, we went into the city on the spur of the moment (as much spur as living 75 kms from nearest city one can have)Sunday night. What a concept. We stayed overnight, the first time in 22 years we didn't need to tell anyone where we were or when we would be back.

We are both in mourning to a certain extent. Acknowledging how painful this time of transition is. We are thankful we enjoy one another's company. Thankful we started out as friends 30 years ago and time has deepened our bond. He still can make my heart do a flip flop.

With no kids waiting our return and with no hurry to get home we took our time coming home yesterday. Maybe during this season we will come home to ourselves.

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